So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
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