Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize
