He is such a slut. More and more my type.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Randomize
