so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize
