Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
You can't motorboat a personality
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Sorry about my life...
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
