Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
