my vag is so smooth its legendary
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize