none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Randomize
