tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
she pinky promised me she was 18
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize