so explain again why im purple
no
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
