Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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