In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
