Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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