she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Randomize
