uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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