dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
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