i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I just blew my weed a kiss
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
