I wannas sexs uuuuu
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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