we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
