I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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