If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
If I die, sorry about rent.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
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