im gay
i know
yea but for you.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
