thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize