I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.