oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
You Will Never Meet Anyone More Annoying Than These 23 People
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...