garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Never underestimate the power of titties
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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