You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Randomize
