i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
