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im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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