the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Randomize
