Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Randomize
