EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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