We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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