My girlfriend figured out who you are.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
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