Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize