i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
This show inspires me to have sex in space
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
Randomize
