My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
