yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
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