Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Randomize
