I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
