I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
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