Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
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