Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
he was CRYING into my vagina
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize