The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
