I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize