I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Randomize