I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
