At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Randomize
