My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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