My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Randomize
